The 6 Human Needs - Part 5/6

Part 5 – The fifth of the 6 human needs – The need for Growth

You may have noticed the natural progression in which the needs transition and evolve.

Without having experienced Certainty, we may not develop the courage and security to explore Uncertainty/Variety.

Without the experience of significance, we do not develop the desire for connection on a deeper level.

The first four needs are considered needs of the personality.

We all find ways to meet these by working harder, by creating problems, by seeking attention.

Today we move on to what are considered needs of the spirit.

Let's talk about the two needs that determine whether we feel truly fulfilled in life and they are far more rarely met.

The first need of the spirit is Growth.

As human beings, we all have a desire to grow and expand in our personal and professional lives.

Nothing grows in a comfort zone – meaning once we dig ourselves into our current environment and satisfy our need for certainty, we start to feel secure and enjoy that feeling. We know our routine; we know what we’re good at; we know how things work and what to expect. We’ve established that this satisfies Need #1.

Then we jiggle the boundaries in line with our own comfort levels, seeking enough uncertainty and variety to keep life exciting.

We seek significance in this environment we’ve created, and we set up relationships and communities that satisfy our need for love and connection.

If you live in an environment where meeting and maintaining the first four needs has taken a larger than average amount of energy, or if your environment keeps shifting, forcing you to readjust, then you’re going to have spent the larger portion of your energy on calculating those moves and have little left for considering growth.

When we get ourselves into a position where our energy starts to flag for any reason, we start to feel uncertain. And what do we do with that uncertainty?

We try and balance it with more certainty, hunkering down in our comfort zone.

Humans will endure amazing levels of negativity (abuse, bad living conditions, toxic working environment, bad culture) as long as it feels predictable to them.

It feels as if it requires more energy to make a change and to grow, to choose something new and different, than to endure their current environment.

And yet….the need remains – creating dissatisfaction and dissent at a deep level – creating undercurrents the same as any unmet need will do.

People are most happy when they are making progress.

Growth is the need to improve ourselves, to always be moving towards a better place physically, mentally, and emotionally. To be maturing, to be advancing. This need for growth pertains to all parts of our lives – not only to us as individuals, but to our relationships and our businesses as well.

There’s a well-known quote that says “If you’re not growing, you’re dying” which I always envisage being said by an incredibly energetic person to people with considerably less energy. It’s true though, when you consider that the alternatives to growth are stagnation, deterioration and eventually, death.

We all need something to strive for, something to challenge us to grow and expand emotionally, spiritually, physically, financially, and intellectually.
Resourceful behaviours: Life-long learning, pursuit of mastery, learning to teach.

How can we nurture the positive attributes of this human need?

Firstly, it requires that we pause and take a serious look at ourselves and our environment.

We need to ask ourselves as individuals “Am I growing?”, “Are my relationships growing?”, “Is my business growing?”

We need to list the ways in which we’re growing to support our argument or acknowledge that we could use some work on meeting this need.

In order to address our need for Growth effectively, we must negotiate the two issues we’ve referred to above: discomfort and lack of energy.

Unless you’re willing to create your own discomfort and grow occasionally, life is likely to shove you out the end of your comfort zone with little grace.

Perhaps it’s worth us looking for that growth voluntarily, or at least embracing the opportunities when they present themselves.

Meet someone new and make the effort to meet up a few times until you can establish a decent rapport. Take on a project that stretches you into new areas of effort. Learn something new about something that interests you.

In terms of energy, no one has control over your own energy other than you.

You wake up every morning with a new opportunity to decide how to manage that energy. If you’re allowing it to be sapped by outside forces, choose to manage that differently and stop giving attention to things you can’t control.

Put decent fuel in your body, and make sure your body is tuned up enough to be of use to you. Do the same for your brain.

Un-resourceful behaviours: Information gathering without application.

The fact of the matter is that Growth is one of our fundamental human needs. It must be satisfied, or it will create discomfort and negative behaviour in us, whether we’re aware of it or not. Without Growth, we have nothing to give the world; nothing of value to offer.

Prepare to grow. Assess your energy levels, reclaim any wasted energy, and redistribute it accordingly. Clear your space out. Reassess what it is you want to aim at and what interests you. Direction and aim balance our need for certainty in a far healthier way than clinging to a comfort zone does.

Ask your team at home and at work how they’d like to grow and what they’re doing about it. Find ways to support them. Be accountable and encouraging towards each other.